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lyrics

Everything’s fucking spinning.
I’ve become nauseated
with all of the attention, the affection, the emotions that I do not care to fucking address.
The emptiness I have rejected and have loathed for quite some time
is starting to become something of a comfort zone,
a craving that I can’t seem to live without.
The desire to just be alone.
I tell myself that’s not what I want
but more and more I find that all of the emotional bombardment
ceases to a glaring hault once I lock myself in.
Black screens staring at me, pages filled with the same three fucking words that just seem to lose all meaning when they are uttered every fucking minute of every fucking day.
I’ve spent so long trying to find comfort in others only to find myself yearning to be isolated from everything else.
I’ll do anything to stop all the ringing in my fucking ears.
JUST MAKE IT STOP

right now
Vice grip, now behold, screaming out of my control,
what a lovely center fold

All of these colorful sounds are starting to blend together

My vision is blurred

Nothing seems to be exciting me anymore

I am just over all of this.

Can I truly be passionate about something that I so desperately want to half ass just so I can be fucking done with it?

What am I even writing about anymore?

I wish anything I said or did was worth something to someone because it sure as shit isn’t to me.
I’m so fucking miserable but I can’t just outright say it.
I don’t want advice,
I don’t care what your opinion on the fucking subject is.
It’s like nobody wants to listen
they just want to play fucking psychiatrist for a day and I could really give a shit.
I’d rather just bottle up my feelings at that rate.
Shut the fuck up.


Everything is just falling apart and I don’t fucking care.

I can’t wait to knock this out

credits

from Painted World of The Holloway Tape, released October 31, 2020

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The Holloway Tape North Port, Florida

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